“Family” Workplace Culture

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You may have noticed that I have taken a bit of a hiatus from posting articles over the last year or so. While I have continued to coach wonderful clients, I decided that I needed to take a break from the blog and articles to allocate time to pursue a big life and career goal of mine: achieving my therapeutic horse riding instructor certification! I have been teaching non-therapeutic horse riding part-time for a couple of years, and teaching people about the incredible healing and wisdom that working with horses brings is one of my passions. I started pursuing my therapeutic instructor certification in late 2021, and through a lot of long hours writing lesson plans and student reports, practice teaching, observing other teachers, researching, and good old-fashioned studying (hello flash cards!), I successfully completed my certification exams this summer.

One of the most important factors to my success in achieving this goal was my persistence in setting boundaries around my time and energy (physical and mental) so that I could pursue this dream. I will be talking more about boundaries in another blog post soon, but I wanted to share some thoughts about something that I have been thinking a lot about recently that came up while reading The Book of Boundaries by Melissa Urban (a book that I would highly recommend and will be discussing further in said future post): the problematic branding of workplace culture as a “family”.

In her book, Urban references a Harvard Business Review Article about employers who define their workplace culture as a “family” and how this creates a toxic environment for employers and employees alike. The full article, The Toxic Effects of Branding Your Workplace a “Family” by Joshua A. Luna (October 27, 2021), is 100% worth reading. After working in corporate environments myself for many years, most of which either explicitly or implicitly used the idea of “family” to define corporate culture, the negative consequences that Luna describes of using this as a cultural keystone were very familiar. Why is a “family” corporate culture so bad? There are many reasons that Luna dives into, but I think the most important are:

  • The concept of “family” creates an unhealthy emotional attachment and expectations of permanency with the organization and other employees. There is an expectation within a true family environment that you will be a family forever, which can be problematic when employees need to be let go or laid off or when someone resigns.
  • Ethical issues resulting from over-loyalty: Luna states “overly-loyal people are more likely to participate in unethical acts to keep their jobs and also more likely to be exploited by their employer”. Have you ever been asked to fudge the truth or outright lie at the request of your boss? Have you been asked or expected to look the other way or brush off inappropriate client or colleague behaviours or comments? Have you been asked or expected not to report unethical or inappropriate behaviours to HR? The backdrop of loyalty and duty that a family dynamic imposes on organizations can result in unethical and inappropriate behaviours not only not being dealt with correctly but can also result in the perpetuation of those behaviours among employees.
  • Exploitation resulting from over-loyalty: Similarly, over-loyalty can easily be used to exploit employees when asking them to work significantly more hours than what is reasonable or was originally expected, take on projects and work that should be compensated at a higher salary or rate, checking emails and working while on vacations, etc. While most of us would of course not think twice about spending extra hours or vacation time helping a family member in need, we do need to think twice about doing this for our employers, co-workers, and organizations.

So, as an employee what can we do about this?

In The Book of Boundaries, Urban suggests that at the job interview the employee should ask “Does the company consider their employees a ‘family’? Why or why not?” I love this! Either way, how the hiring manager or HR interviewer answers the question will give you a lot of insight into the culture and how self-aware the company is about its corporate culture and expectations on employees. If they answer “Yes, we are a close family!” that is obviously a major red flag and you should ask for more details about what that family culture means to them. If they answer “No, we understand and respect that employees are employees and need to have a life outside of work” that is a great lead-in to asking about expectations around work hours, work-life balance, etc.

As an employer what can we do about this? Luna recommends a few strategies:

Strategy 1: “define high performance.” Have clear policies about work hours, time off, expectations about checking emails or working while on vacation or outside of work hours. Also having clear expectations about performance and having set evaluation metrics to assess performance will bring the employer and employees onto the same page about what it means to be high-performing in the organization.

Strategy 2: “focus on purpose.” Have a common purpose for the organization and employees that everyone can buy into and pursue together. Employees working towards a common goal in a professional environment while maintaining their individual autonomy will both help to achieve the organization’s goals and help deter peer pressure to give up healthy work-life boundaries, ethical boundaries, etc.

Strategy 3: “mutually accept the temporary and professional nature of this relationship.” When employees and managers appreciate that they won’t be working together forever, this can not only diffuse interpersonal conflicts that may arise (as in a sibling/parent-child relationship) but it also helps employees tune into the fact that this position is just one step on their long career path. This long-term career view can help employees reduce stress and guilt about maintaining a work-life balance and lay the ground work for healthy relationships with managers and colleagues.

Have you/are you working in a “family” workplace culture? What have you noticed about how this description affects your workplace? Are there positives or negatives that you experience? How do you manage these? I’d love to hear from you!

Career Challenges Month: Workload

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February is Career Challenges month at Wild Sage Coaching and Mentorship, and I’m so excited to help you navigate your workplace challenges!

Thanks so much to everyone who filled out my Instagram and LinkedIn surveys on your biggest career challenges right now. Overwhelmingly, the most popular responses that I got were about workload. This is very understandable, as most people were already juggling large workloads before COVID, and for many people, the pandemic has created additional work that needs to also be managed.

So what do you do when you feel like your workload far exceeds the number of hours in your work day? How do you get everything done and keep your boss happy without working 15-hour days or burning out?

Here are some tips to tackle your workload:

Tip 1: Write down your to-do list

In point form, write down everything that is currently on your plate from the big projects to the small items. Be specific about what needs to be done, and don’t worry about the order of importance for now. The purpose is to get your to-do list out of your mind and onto paper, where you can see it objectively. Writing down your list also means that you don’t need to keep track of all of the items in your mind, which is distracting and tiring for the brain.

Once you have your master to-do list on paper, look at what are the top priority items. What needs to get done today, what needs to get done this week, what needs to get done in the next 30 days?

Now, make a list of the items that are the priority for today and then cross those items off the master list. Hopefully, the list of priorities for today is much more manageable than the master list, and you can see more clearly what your focus needs to be for today.

As you go through your day and finish each item, cross off the tasks from your “Today” list. Crossing items off a list gives you a sense of accomplishment, and since you can literally see your workload decreasing, it also helps to stay motivated.

Tip 2: Block off time in your calendar

Once you have your list of to-dos for the day, select a block of time in your calendar and block off time for each task as an appointment. Be realistic about how long you think each item will take, and set a reminder for each of these appointments. If you are using MS Outlook or another version of an electronic calendar that allows you to show your status as booked or unavailable, do this as well.

During the appointment time, put your phone on silent and your email or team messaging apps on Do Not Disturb, so that you aren’t distracted. Also, try to have about 15-30 minutes between each appointment block to get a snack, return any urgent emails or phone calls, etc, so that you can fully focus on each task during the designated appointment time.

Of course, you may not be able to get everything done on an item during the appointment time, and that’s ok. Have some windows in your calendar where you don’t have any tasks booked. You can use this time to finish up any tasks or check off some lower-priority items from your master to-do list.

The goal here is to have time with no distractions and you don’t need to worry about the rest of your to-do list. That block of time is just for that one item, and you know that you have time allocated to get the remaining priorities for your day done as well. This can help you feel less overwhelmed by your workload and stay focused on each task.

Tip 3: Be firm about your priorities

As emails and phone calls come in, it can be easy to work on what’s most recent or easy rather than what’s most important. This is why writing down your priorities for the day is so important, since it will help you stay on track with what needs to get done. Of course, if a new task comes in that is a higher priority than what’s on your list, it’s totally ok to re-allocate some time in your calendar to work on the new item.

If a new request comes in that isn’t more important than your current task list, you can respond to say “Thanks for sending this over. I will work on this and aim to have this to you by the end of the week.”

If, however, a new request comes in with a deadline that conflicts with your current list of priorities and it isn’t as important as your urgent list for today, you can say “I see that you are looking for a response today. I’m currently booked up with finalizing projects A, B, and C, but I can send you the answer to your request tomorrow.” Being clear about your timelines and priorities with others will help you to manage expectations.

Tip 4: Unsure about what’s the top priority? Ask!

If the response to the above example requesting an immediate turn around on a seemingly low-priority task is that the task also needs to be done today, it is 100% ok to ask your manager for guidance. Your manager should be able to tell you what the priorities are so that you can manage your time most effectively and manage everyone’s expectations.

If the new request is not a top priority according to your manager, then you can proceed to work on the other priority items, knowing that you have your manager’s support.

Tip 5: If everything is a priority, ask for help!

Ideally, the list of priorities from your manager will not be not greater than the amount of work that someone can reasonably get done in a day. However, if your workload is too heavy and you find that you are frequently working late or working on weekends in order to keep up, then it’s time to have a conversation with your manager. Every job has busy times of year, so sometimes a large workload is unavoidable for a few weeks, but if over-working is becoming chronic and is not a temporary challenge, you need to ask for help.

Approaching a conversation with your manager about workload can feel really intimidating, but consider that you are having the conversation in order to take care of your mental and physical health. Your health and well-being are truly your most important priorities, and you won’t be able to take care of clients, files, projects, etc if you aren’t already taking good care of yourself.

Ask your manager if you can set up some time together to talk about your workload and come up with a strategy to ensure that everything gets accomplished. Then, prepare your to-do list (see Tip 1 above). Having a physical list that you can show your manager of what is currently on your plate can help them see what you are working on and what tasks might be able to be re-assigned to other employees. Sometimes we are working on tasks that our managers don’t even realize we are doing (this is incredibly common), and taking those things off our plate can be really helpful. Having a list can also help your manager understand your time and work contributions to the team more clearly, and this list will help support you in your ask for some support or re-allocation of workload.

Be respectful and clear about your request to find a way to manage your workload so that you are able not only to meet expectations and deadlines but also to deliver excellent work on each item. Ask if there are items on your to-do list that could be re-allocated to another team member (you may have suggestions for this as well) and confirm with your manager what the priorities are and that they are realistic for your workload. Confirming the priorities with your manager will also be helpful if you are asked to take on a new task, since you have now laid the groundwork to ask which of the current priorities should be set aside or re-allocated in order to work on the new task.

Are you looking for support as you navigate a career challenge? I provide my clients with experience-based mentorship advice and supportive coaching to help them successfully manage workplace challenges. I’m a confidential and objective resource for you, and I’m here to champion you to live your best life. Contact me here to set up a free discovery call!

January Wellness and Self-Care Series Part V: Your Self-Care Toolkit

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It’s already January 31, and we’ve come to the last installment of the January Wellness and Self-Care Series! Today’s post is about putting it all together and thinking about self-care in a more holistic way; as a way of living your life rather than something special that you do occasionally when you are feeling stressed. The more you can make self-care part of your regular routine, the easier it will be to manage stress before you reach burn out and overwhelm and the better you will feel overall.

Think of self-care as a toolkit that you are utilizing every day to help support your body and mind. These are not always easy things to do, and often self-care takes deliberate intention, but I promise that these will help you to stay healthy, happy, and energized.

In previous installments of this series, I talked about sleep, yoga, meditation, and breathing exercises, which are all really key tools to have and prioritize. Here are some additional self-care tools that will be helpful:

Exercise

Exercise is really important for keeping your body and mind healthy. Exercise can help clear the mind and actually give you more energy, which will help you to take on challenging tasks or situations. Exercise is also a key factor for sleeping well and managing stress hormones. Not sure where to start? Try going for a 15 minute walk at lunchtime, taking the stairs at work or in your apartment, or doing a quick YouTube workout exercise. You don’t need to exercise for hours to get the benefits, and even 20 minutes each day will be helpful.

Journaling

Keeping a journal is a great way to track how you’re feeling over a period of time and also to process how you are feeling in a way that is different from simply thinking or talking about it. When we write out how we feel, we can see those thoughts and feelings more objectively when they are on paper. Having a bit of distance from our thoughts and feelings can help put them in perspective and can shed more light on the cause of the worry. This can help us make decisions about how to manage that worry or identify what resources we may need to solve that situation. Journaling also doesn’t need to be a daily practice for it to be beneficial, and any frequency of journaling will be helpful.

Create and maintain a relaxing space

Living or working in a chaotic or messy space can actually increase our stress and anxiety, so take some time to really look at the physical spaces in which you work, live, and sleep. Are these spaces messy and disorganized, do they give you a feeling of stress, and are you able to concentrate or are you often distracted? Consider ways that you can make your space feel more relaxing, perhaps by organizing and de-cluttering, adding plants or a candle, keeping a pair of earplugs nearby, or having a relaxing music playlist ready to go on your phone . Your external environment has a huge impact on your internal environment, so creating a calm, relaxing space is a very good investment of your time and doesn’t need to cost anything!

Physical health

Making your physical health a priority will not only keep your body in good condition but it also will help your mental health. Ensure that you are up-to-date on your doctor and dentist appointments, prescription refills, haircuts, nail care, etc. Know that these are just as important priorities as a work meeting or assignment, and notice how you feel mentally after taking time to look after your physical health. Remember, if you don’t stop to look after your body, your body will eventually make you stop when it gets sick or injured.

Supportive resources

We all have times where we really need some help managing a stressful situation or sorting through our feelings. Having a list of friends, family members, coaches, etc whom you can reach out to for support, outside perspective, or just a friendly ear to listen is a key part of your self-care toolkit. Often someone else will have a perspective or an idea that you hadn’t considered and having another person’s input on a situation can be really affirming and supportive. Reaching out to a counselor or doctor can also be very helpful for support, and these professionals can help you explore if there are also any other factors that may be impacting your mental and physical health, such as hormone levels, diet, etc.

Building these self-care tools into your life will help you to feel your best and manage stress when it inevitably arises. Also, being aware of what tools you have available in your toolkit will help you to utilize them even more in times of increased stress or a busy schedule.

I hope you found this month’s Wellness and Self-Care Series to be helpful and that you have picked up some ideas for how to incorporate more self-care into your daily life. If you have any questions or additional self-care tools that you find helpful, I’d love to hear from you! Contact me here or check out my Packages and Services page for more information about my life coaching and career mentorship services.

January Wellness and Self-Care Series Part IV: Breath

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How often do you stop and notice your breath? For most of us, the answer is not very often.

Our bodies will of course continue to breathe whether we are aware of our breathing or not; however, how we breathe is a really useful thing to pay attention to, and by changing how we breathe, we can significantly change how we feel and think. Studies show that there are links between our breathing rate and the depth of our breath and activation in certain parts of the brain. When we breathe slowly and deeply, we can help calm our minds and nervous systems, thereby reducing anxiety and stress. When our breath is quick and shallow, this activates our minds, and we can start to feel anxious and stressed.

Taking time to notice how we are breathing and deepening our breath for even one or two minutes can have a huge impact on our ability to manage stress, think creatively, and stay calm. If I’m feeling stressed, I try to pause for a couple of minutes a few times throughout the day to just think about my breath and do a quick breath work exercise. Even noticing if I’m breathing deeply or shallowly can be a really helpful way of understanding how much stress I am carrying in my body throughout the day, and the breathing exercises can help to relieve some of that stress.

There are tons of different types and examples of breath work exercises, but here are a few of my favourites:

Box Breathing – think about breathing in four equal parts (like the four sides of a perfect square): inhale, pause, exhale, pause. Try doing each part for an equal time count, such as 4 or 5 counts. Inhale for 4 counts, pause for 4 counts, exhale for 4 counts, pause for 4 counts. Repeat this sequence continuously for 4-6 full cycles of breath. Here’s a quick video to guide you through an example:

Extending The Exhale – count your inhale breath and then try to exhale for a longer time count. For example, if your inhale is 5 counts, exhale more slowly for 6-8 counts. You don’t need to add a short pause between the inhale and exhale, but you can definitely do so if that feels helpful and calming.

Belly Breathing – notice where you feel your breath moving. Is it in your chest or is it in your belly. Slowly start to focus on your belly as you breathe, and think about expanding your belly outwards as you slowly inhale and then gently bringing your belly back to neutral as you slowly exhale. You can also place your hands gently on your stomach to help feel your breath moving your belly. Belly breathing helps us breathe more deeply into our lungs, which pushes our belly outwards as the lungs expand. Continue breathing in this way for about 10 full cycles of breath or until you feel calm.

These breathing exercises can be done anywhere at any time and are easy to remember. Once you have learned one, try doing this before something that you find stressful, like a presentation, a job interview, or a difficult conversation. Notice how slowing and expanding your breath helps focus your mind and keeps you calm.

Looking for more ways to incorporate self-care into your routine or better manage stressful work situations in 2022? I’d love to help you! Contact me to set up a free discovery call to learn more about career mentorship and life coaching, or check out my Packages and Services page.

January Wellness and Self-Care Series Part III: Meditation

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I find that meditation is key to managing stress and staying focused & present throughout my day. If I’m feeling overwhelmed by tasks or worries and am not sure where to start, meditation helps me focus on one thing at a time and calms my racing mind. When I meditate regularly, I also notice that I’m able to be more thoughtful and calm overall, and I notice that I’m then better able to manage stressful situations with more presence and a clearer mind. As I also mentioned in my recent post on Sleep, regularly meditating helps me sleep much better.

One of the great things about meditation is that it doesn’t require any special equipment and it doesn’t need to take more than a couple of minutes, so you can meditate anywhere, anytime. There are also tons of positive benefits to our physical and mental health, including reducing anxiety and depression, keeping our brains young, and helping us learn and concentrate more effectively. Check out this great article on some of the studies that have been done on the effects of meditation.

What is meditation?

Meditation is the process of focusing the mind and being fully present. When you meditate, you are bringing your attention to one specific thing. This point of focus can be your breath, a specific part of your body, an emotion, an image, a word, a sound, etc. The goal is to keep your focus on this point and to bring your focus back to this point whenever your mind starts to wander. Our minds are always working and processing information, so thoughts are inevitable. The purpose of meditation is not to have a clear, unthinking mind during your meditation session; rather, the purpose is to notice when your mind has wandered and then bring your attention back to your point of focus. Each time you return to your point of focus, you are exercising your focus “muscle,” and your attention and concentration will improve overtime. Of course, when our concentration improves, we are then better able to stay focused on tasks, be more present, and feel less distracted by worries and wandering thoughts throughout our day.

There are many different types of meditation, but anything that focuses your mind on one thing and that you can continually bring your attention to is meditation. So, meditation doesn’t always mean sitting quietly and focusing on your breath or a mantra; you can also meditate while walking, exercising, making lunch, etc. Any time you are deeply focusing on one thing, you are meditating.

How long should a meditation session be?

Meditation doesn’t need to take a long time. Research is demonstrating that meditating for a short amount of time more often will actually achieve better results than meditating for a long period of time less frequently. So, if you can’t fit in 30 minutes of meditation each day, that’s not a problem! Meditating for 5 or 10 minutes every day will have really positive impacts. If you need a quick mental re-set during your day, try meditating for even 2 or 3 minutes. I sometimes do a quick meditation while waiting for an elevator or before heading into an important meeting. Any amount of concentrated attention on one point of focus will be beneficial.

Ready to meditate? Let’s get started!

There are tons of meditation resources out there. Here are a few that I find really helpful:

Headspace – the Headspace app is a great place to start if you are new to meditation or if you struggle to incorporate meditation into your regular routine. They have awesome animations and videos to help address common challenges, and they have tons of options for learning meditation, single sessions, meditation timers, and multi-day courses that focus on different things like sleep, stress, patience, etc. Headspace also have lots of great resources for sleep, including sleep music and sleepcasts.

MindShift – if you are in Canada, the MindShift app is an excellent free resource to help with anxiety and managing stress. They have really good articles, journal prompts, and guided meditation recordings, and you can do daily check-ins to track feelings of stress over time.

YouTube – there are tons of great meditations on YouTube as well, and this is a great option for trying out different styles of meditation. Here is a quick guided meditation that I created, which includes a body scan and focusing on the breath:

If you are looking to better manage stress and achieve more work-life balance in the new year, a career mentor and life coach is an excellent, supportive and confidential resource that can help set you up for success! To find out more about my coaching and mentorship services, check out my Services and Packages page or contact me to set up a free 30 minute discovery call.

January Wellness and Self-Care Series Part II: Yoga

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Yoga has become one of the key pillars of the wellness industry, and there are now many different types of yoga to choose from. Especially in Vancouver, it can be easy to get caught up in the yoga accoutrements: the clothes, the mats, the props, the water bottles, etc. While I also do love fun new yoga clothes and a beautiful mat, what I really love about yoga is the opportunity to turn off my phone, put away my emails, and focus in on my breath and my body. Often, I will be rushing around, trying to check off my to-do list and not realize that I haven’t taken a full deep breath for most of the day; I haven’t looked around and noticed the colour of the ocean or the sound of the rain (it is January after all). Yoga offers me the chance to be still and present with where I am and how I am feeling.

One of the reasons that yoga is so central to self-care is that it is an excellent way to activate the parasympathetic mode of our nervous system, which is also known as the rest and digest mode. The parasympathetic nervous system allows our body and mind to heal and recover from stress, whether that stress comes from a difficult work meeting, sitting in traffic, or running on the treadmill. By moving our bodies in time with our breath (which is central to every style of yoga) and by focusing on our breath and body, we calm our nervous system and activate that rest and digest mode. This is why we typically feel so relaxed after a yoga class, even a challenging and high-energy class.

There are so many styles of yoga out there, so here’s an overview of some of the different types of practices:

Hatha – this is a great style to start with if you are new to yoga or want something gentle. Hatha yoga is primarily focused on improving flexibility through gentle poses and simple transitions between the poses.

Restorative – I love doing restorative yoga first thing in the morning or right before bed. Restorative yoga uses gentle poses that calm the nervous system (like legs up the wall, child’s pose, and seated forward fold). The focus is less on stretching than on tuning into your breath and calming your mind and body.

Yin – this style focuses on holding each pose for an extended period of time (usually 3-6 minutes). You will do fewer poses than you would in a Hatha or Restorative class, but you will spend more time in each pose, so it’s a nice opportunity to really focus on how breath can help us stretch. I like to use a lot of pillows, blankets, and blocks to support my body in the poses and make the long holds more comfortable.

Flow/Vinyasa – a fun, high energy yoga practice that will get you sweating for sure! This style of yoga usually has a good mix of standard poses and some more challenging poses, so this is a great style if you want to advance your yoga skills. The transitions between poses are relatively fast but fluid, and you will often repeat the same sequence of several poses 2 or 3 times in order to get into the rhythm of moving into and out of the poses in time with your breath.

Power – similar to Flow/Vinyasa yoga, Power yoga is a high-energy practice; however, the main difference is that the poses tend to be more challenging and you hold the challenging poses for a longer period of time than in a Flow/Vinyasa class. These classes are a great work out and the focus is to build strength as well as flexibility.

Hot Yoga – these classes will generally use the same or a very similar sequence of poses every class and across studios, and the sequence is a combination of standard and challenging poses. The primary challenge in a Hot Yoga class is that you are exercising in a very hot room, which is usually 33 – 40 degrees Celsius (92 – 105 degrees Fahrenheit). Because of the heat, it’s extra important to make sure that you are staying really well hydrated during and after your class and take breaks whenever you need.

Although yoga studios are currently closed in Vancouver and elsewhere due to COVID, there are so many great options for doing yoga at home. YouTube and the FitOn app have tons of free yoga classes, and many studios are also offering virtual class options. I’ve been using The Movement Method for my at-home yoga classes over the past year, and I really love it (Kate Gillespie was also one of my instructors for my yoga teacher training program, and she’s absolutely brilliant!)

If you haven’t tried yoga before or if it is not something you regularly practice, I recommend giving it a try! Even doing a few poses for a quick 10 minute stretch can make a big difference in how you feel.

Looking for support in managing stress or achieving a better work-life balance in 2022? Contact me to find out more about how coaching and mentorship can help you to find balance and calm.

January Wellness and Self-Care Series Part I: Tips for Better Sleep

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I’ve decided to kick off this January Wellness and Self-Care Series with a topic that is for me the foundation for a healthy mind and body and often the canary in the coal mine that tells me when something is off: Sleep.

Insomnia has been something that I’ve struggled with off and on since high school. Sometimes I have no problem falling asleep and staying asleep, but in times of increased stress and a busy schedule, I find that my sleep can become easily disrupted.

Many people have experienced some type of disruption of their normal sleeping patterns since the start of the COVID pandemic, and many may also have found consistent, quality sleep to be a challenge even before the pandemic.

Through my journey and search for better sleep, I’ve tried a ton of different techniques and learned a lot. Here are a few tips and tricks that help me when I am having trouble sleeping:

Turn off those screens

I find this one challenging to do, but it really does help. Turning off all screens (phone, iPad, TV, laptop, etc) at least one hour before bed and using that time to consciously wind-down helps to slow down my thoughts and focus on relaxing. Taking an hour before bed to do some light yoga, do a breathing exercise, meditate, have a bath, journal, or read a book is a great way to prepare the mind for a good night’s sleep and gives our eyes and brains a break from the blue light that is emitted by electronic screens, which can keep us awake.

Have a snack

I’ve heard different advice on this. Some people say that eating before bed keeps the brain awake because the body is working to digest your food. However, I’ve found that if I have a light snack before I go to bed, I tend to fall asleep easily and am more likely to stay asleep during the night. Avoid anything with caffeine or anything that is rich or hard to digest. I find that a cup of warm almond milk with a little bit of ground cardamom or nutmeg (a great recommendation from HeyMonicaB‘s blog) or a cup of camomile tea is perfect. See what works best for you and your body.

Meditate

I find that meditating during the day (in addition to before bed) can really help with my sleep at night. One of my favourite meditation resources is Headspace, which has different “packs” for different things you want to focus on. I love the 30-day Sleep Pack, which is designed to be done during the day. The meditations help your mind be calm during the day so that you can sleep better at night.

Another meditation technique that I really like is a mantra-breath meditation, which was taught to me at a yoga workshop by the amazing Rebekka Walker. To do this meditation, sit with your eyes closed or with a soft, focused gaze and bring your attention to your breath. As you breathe, say to yourself in your mind (not out loud) “Hum” on the in breath and “Sah” on the out breath. Your mind will wander – this is totally ok and bringing your focus back to your breath when the mind wanders is actually the goal of meditation! When you find that your mind has wandered, just softly bring your attention back to your breath and the mantra. After a few minutes of focusing on the mantra, let the mantra go and just breathe, letting your mind rest softly for another minute or two before focusing again on your body and surroundings. The nice thing about mantra meditation is that the mantra helps to keep the mind focused and gives you something to come back to when the mind inevitably wanders.

Sleepcasts and podcasts

When I’m having trouble falling asleep or when I wake up in the night, I find listening to a sleep/podcast helps focus my mind away from the worries and stress that are keeping me awake and helps me fall asleep.

Headspace (I’m a big fan of this app!) has sleepcasts and sleep music that you can listen to to drift off to sleep. The sleepcasts are slow, calm stories that have different themes (my favourites are the Indigo Gallery and the Midnight Launderette), and they start off with a relaxing breathing exercise, which also helps to focus the mind. I also like to fall asleep to the sleep music, which is very calm and relaxing.

I also love the podcast Nothing Much Happens. Each episode starts with a breathing exercise, and then the host (Kathryn Nicolai) reads a story of about 15 minutes long that is highly detailed with sensory information (colours, sounds, textures, etc) and where nothing much happens. After the first read through, she reads the story again a second time at a slower pace. I find this podcast very effective for falling asleep, and I’m rarely awake for the second read through of the story. I also find that if I listen to this podcast when I first go to sleep, I seem to sleep very deeply and usually don’t wake up in the night.

Don’t stress about sleep

This is much easier said than done, but it’s true. If you can’t sleep, try not to worry about not sleeping. Get up, have a snack (see above), read a book, listen to a sleep/podcast, etc, and try not to let stress about sleep prevent you from sleeping. Just remember that the time you spend relaxing when you can’t sleep is still beneficial for your mind and body, and the more you can calm your mind and body, the better rest you will get once you do fall asleep. The most important thing is to be kind and patient with yourself always, and especially now during these difficult times.

Want to learn more about stress management and personal development? I can help! Contact me to learn more about my career mentorship and life coaching services and to set up a free 30 minute discovery session.

New Year Reflections

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I hope that everyone had a wonderful holiday season and New Year’s! We had a ton of snow and cold weather in Vancouver over the past week, which is very unusual for us. This meant snowed-in streets and a quiet teaching schedule, so I had a lot of time to curl up inside with books and tea (one of my favourite activities).

All of the downtime that comes with snowy weather (especially on the West Coast) has made me think about the value of rest. When I have enough time to rest, I find that I’m way more energized and engaged with my work, I can problem solve more effectively, and I can take care of myself and others around me so much better.

Rest is a big concept that can mean many different things to different people. When we rest, we engage the parasympathetic mode of our nervous system (also known as rest and digest mode). The parasympathetic mode allows our body and mind to heal and recover from stress, which is when our nervous system is in sympathetic (fight or flight) mode. Depending on your day, situation, energy levels, etc, rest can look like having a bath and taking a nap or it can look like meeting up with friends to go hiking. Having several options for how to rest is helpful when deciding how to spend your downtime in the most helpful way for your mind and body in that moment.

Over the month of January, I’ll be writing a Wellness and Self-Care Series, which will include tips on how to improve your sleep, methods for rest, and a couple of videos with breathing and meditation exercises that you can use whenever you need.

I hope you find the series helpful, and please of course feel free to reach out to me with any questions or comments. Sending you all the best wishes for a wonderful, restful new year!

Special Holiday Promo (and a great gift idea!)

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Somehow, it’s already the end of November, and I’m decorating my home with lights, listening to Christmas playlists (I know, I know – it’s not even December yet), and starting my holiday shopping! Where has this year gone?

In order to celebrate the holidays this year, I’m excited to offer a really special holiday promo: from now until December 25, 2021, I am offering a package of three 1-hour coaching sessions for $220.

If you or one of your friends or family are looking to get started in the workforce, thinking about making a career change, hoping to advance in your career, or better manage stress and work-life balance, working with a coach and mentor is a great way to set yourself up for success and achieve your goals. Your coach keeps you accountable, gives you an objective perspective, and provides experience-based advice and support. As your coach and mentor, I am here to champion you!

These three sessions can be used any time but must be purchased before December 25, 2021. Sessions can be purchased as a gift for someone else or for yourself (because you deserve a holiday treat too!).

In order to purchase this special three session package or if you have any questions, contact me here.

Wishing you a very Happy Holidays!

Two Client Spots Open!

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Happy Tuesday from Vancouver!

I hope you had an amazing Summer and are enjoying this transition into cozy September. Fall is my favourite season, and I always feel a sense of excitement and possibility as the seasons change this time of year. I start thinking about what I want to accomplish in the remainder of the year, how I want to feel moving into a new year, and how I can incorporate more fun into my regular routine.

If you’re similarly inspired by the new season to make some changes and are transitioning into the workforce, looking for a career or job shift, hoping to set and achieve big goals, or seeking support in managing stress or work/life balance, career mentorship and life coaching can help you get there! 

I champion my clients in dreaming big and living their best life, and I have two client spots open now! Contact me to set up a free 30-minute discovery call to learn more, or check out available Packages and Services.

🍁🍂 Have a lovely week and happy Fall! 🍂